Life is a Song
by DragonAmante
Summary: Harry and his siblings have moved yet again to a new Arts School - but is this year going to be the same old boring stuff they're used to? At Hogwarts, they don't do boring...
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

Hogwarts Academy for the Arts is a small specialist high school situated god only knows where in Scotland. Britain's finest art students come here to study Music, Dance, Acting and Visual Arts. Four Houses provide living facilities and a means of close friendships and alliances – Slytherin, Griffindor, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff.

Ordinary classes are taught every day, but so are all artistic disciplines – every student participates in basic lessons for each, as well as extensive specialist classes for their individual specialties.

A student studying violin at Hogwarts is expected to not only take ordinary lessons, but also basic acting, dancing, painting and sculpture, as well as several violin lessons and tutorials and musical theory workshops.

Funnily enough Hogwarts students are very busy.

Especially since they like to party – hard.

Last year Seamus Finnegan got so drunk he ended up comatose in the back of Headmaster Dumbledore's car: no-one knows how he got there.

Last year Sirius Black won a drinking competition against Lucius Malfoy: and promptly spilled his guts into the swimming pool.

Last year a lot of people did things that they later regretted but the whole school already knew all about.

Last year was one drama after another.

This year shouldn't be all that different.

Welcome to Hogwarts Academy.


	2. Intro to War

**Ok, so the last one kinda died on me (partly because I lost the book...) but this one wanted to be written.**

**Yes, the premise is a bit cliche, but I promise that the plot won't be - and there will be slashy smutt galore in later chapters, because I love it.**

**Obviously I don't own JK's characters, although I wish I did - there'd be a lot more smutt if I did.**

**Chapter One: Intro to War**

Harry sat on his suitcase and stared around the room, not really paying attention to his siblings or anthing else around him. So far Hogwarts didn't seem all that different from his last arts school – they both featured old architecture and silence. Jack was humming to himself again, something he frequently did just to annoy James, while his twin Rosalie sat on a windowsill, staring out into the grounds. James was pacing, back and forth. They were waiting for the Deputy Headmistress, their parents having departed a few minutes ago.

A young man came tearing through the room as though chased by monsters, shortly followed by a girl of similar age.

"Get back here Sirius Black! You owe me, bastard!" The intrusion was quite a shock, and James found himself flung aside as they tore through the door behind him. As silence regained its hold the four Potter siblings looked around at each other in shock. No-one would've got away with that kind of behaviour at their last school.

Harry couldn't help smiling to himself. Maybe this school was going to be different afterall.

"Now. James, Harry; you two will be sleeping down this corridor here – the senior Griffindor boys' wing." As Professor McGonagall pointed their rooms out to them, Harry tried to stifle a gasp of dismay. The rooms themselves seemed well-built, but the walls...

It looked as though every available surface was covered in paint (or other unknown substances). In some cases this seemed deliberate – some of the pictures were beautiful, and there were poems written everywhere. But there were also blatant spatters, as though there had been a few too many accidents and maybe a few paint wars. Harry's door featured a brilliant phoenix, some red blobs, and the words 'Music is deceiving, dare you trust the music of the night?'* in giant caligraphy. James' wasn't much better, almost entirely covered in a magnificent red stag.

A door slammed open, revealing a boy who looked remarkably like the picture of a shaggy dog that graced its panelling. With a start Harry realised it was the boy who'd raced past them earlier.

"Hey Professor, Lily isn't around anymore, right?" He seemed quite nervous, and Harry guessed that the red-haired girl he'd seen chasing the boy must be Lily. Professor McGonagall looked stern.

"Mr. Black, was it really wise to 'borrow' her ballet slippers?" Black at least had the decency to look sheepish, but Harry could spot the grin lurking on his face.

"What did you do with her ballet shoes?" James asked, grinning like a maniac. It was obvious the two of them would be good friends quite quickly. Professor McGonagall sighed and decided to leave them to it.

"Used them... but my feet are a bit too big," he replied, smirking now that they were out of sight of any teachers. "Totally ruined them in order to keep a bet. I'm Sirius by the way." Introductions were made all round, before Harry decided to leave them in order to unpack. Sirius was the same age as James, so would be in all his classes except Specialties – Harry, being two years younger, felt it would be better to make his own friends later.

As he trailed behind James and Sirius on their way to dinner, he tried to keep an eye out for the twins. They'd been placed in Ravenclaw (due to space availability) and since they were younger and taking different Specialties, it was unlikely he'd see them outside of meals.

Whilst looking for them he spotted a blonde boy looking at him curiously, before being dragged into the hall by someone who appeared to be relative, if the platinum hair was anything to go by. Sirius caught him watching them and tugged on his sleeve.

"You want to watch out for them, Harry. Draco and Lucius Malfoy are evil gits, in Slytherin. And since darling Draco's taking your Specialty..." The sarcastic overtones of 'darling Draco' were enough to tell Harry that Sirius _really_ didn't like the two blondes, and he resolved to be on his guard around them. He'd particularly disliked the look Lucius had given him anyway.

They ended up seated in the midst of red-heads, which thoughroughly confused Harry until he realised that most of them were related – Fred and George were twins in James and Sirius' year, Ron was in Harry's, and Ginny the year below. Lily was the only one not related to them, but since she was talking to a Barbie-lookalike and pointedly ignoring Sirius she didn't really count as part of the group.

"Wow Sirius, what'd you do to get Evans so pissed?" Fred laughed, and Sirius promptly launched into an elaborate tale of drunken bets and broken shoes.

Glancing around the room, Harry finally spotted his younger siblings. They were seated next to a dreamy-looking girl with incredibly long blonde hair and bizarre clothing and an older asian girl, who seemed to be explaining something (if Rosalie's engrossed expression was anything to go by). It appeared that the twins had already settled into their House nicely, so Harry tried not to worry, despite his disappointment that the Houses even sat together. He'd likely not see his siblings properly until the weekend, and he'd always enjoyed spending time with them. Jack was quite quiet, but came out with some amazing observations, and Rose was witty and chatty enough to make anyone want to spend more time with her. With constant changes of school and the closeness of age, Harry'd sometimes become their 'triplet', and it was disconcerting to know he wouldn't be able to do that anymore.

Something hit him in the head, breaking him out of his reverie.

"Oops, sorry mate – I was aiming for Seamus," Ron sniggered, scooping up a second spoonful and hurling them at a boy close to them. They connected with a satisfying splat, and Harry couldn't stop himself from laughing: which promptly earned him a faceful of gravy from the irate Irishman. Ron handed him a napkin, grinning madly before starting a pea-battle with a dark boy Harry later learned was called Dean Thomas. It was unclear who won in the end however, as the entire table erupted in a free-for-all fight that only ended when Sirius 'accidentally' got Lucius Malfoy as he sat glaring at them all from the Slytherin table – Professor Snape promptly took 150 points and gave Sirius detention.

"Oh, Sevvie, I didn't realise you wanted us to spend more time together!" Sirius' remark sent Griffindor into gales of laughter, but the smirk soon left Sirius' face as he lost a further 20 points and got another detention with Filch, the caretaker.

That night Harry lay in bed thinking over all he had learnt. Griffindor seemed like a fun House, especially if dinner was anything to go by. Ron had offered to help Harry find all his classes the next day, and Harry suspected they were going to be good friends; it turned out they were even doing Music together, although different Specialties – Ron was in Percussion, and Harry Violin. James and Sirius were well on the way to being inseparable already, busy plotting pranks and sharing past ideas. There were only two things bothering Harry about this new school: the lack of contact he'd be having with Jack and Rose, and the obvious disdain towards him from the Malfoys.

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The next morning Harry woke up to shrieks and yells and the thudding steps of students running up and down the corridors. Ron even flung the door open to scream at Harry to 'get up before we're all late for breakfast'. The Slytherins had disabled Griffindor's morning alarm system, and the entire House was late. Getting ready was also made difficult by the dismantling of the bathroom plumbing and the sellotape over several doorways.

"Bastards must've come in while we were asleep. I'm going to _kill_ Lucius Malfoy! This _has_ to've been his idea!" Sirius' ranting carried on even as they all pelted towards the dining hall enmasse, in an attempt to actually eat before class. Some people weren't very lucky – anyone taking Painting had had a morning tutorial, so breakfast for them was out if they wanted to make it to class.

Dean was still rather bitter about this a few hours later as he wolfed down his impressively large lunch (to the delight of the watching Slytherins, who were laughing their heads off).

"I mean, can't they give a guy a break? Morning tutorial's suck ass anyway, but with your stomach screaming the whole time? Utter nightmare."

The others tried to be consoling, but Ron only managed murderous.

"Look at Malfoy, the smug git. We have to get old Drakie-kins back for this one guys." Harry was puzzled by this.

"I thought Sirius said it was Lucius? Why are we attacking Draco?" Ron looked at him as though he was mental, but Seamus was considerate enough to explain that if Lucius had planned it, then most of the House would've been in on it – it was garunteed that Draco Malfoy had helped his older brother attack Griffindor. So now Griffindor needed to retaliate...

It was decided during lunch that the best revenge was a similar plot. As the Masterminds, Sirius, James and the Weasley twins would break into Slytherin that night and wreck havoc on the bathrooms and common room. Harry himself was a bit wary of all this – Hogwarts was turning out to be more of a school of warfare than a school of arts. Ron's assurances that all of this was perfectly normal did little to ease his concerns, and he sincerely hoped he never had cause to attack Ravenclaw: the last time he'd got on the twins bad side he'd been nine, and they'd framed him for several 'crimes' that had seen him grounded for two months. Now they were older and smarter, and quite frankly probably a lot nastier if inspired to vengeance.

That evening had Harry praying for the first time in years – that his own siblings wouldn't kick his ass in the near future.

* _The Music of the Night_, Lloyd Webber. And yes, it's a bit of an omen if I keep to the plot I'm currently using in my head...

**Please let me know what you think, criticisms most welcome :)**


	3. Riddle Me This

**Wow. Can I just say, you guys are awesome? I don't think I've ever got so many reviews for a first chapter.**

**I'm glad you seem to like it, and I hope this one doesn't disappoint! I felt I aught to introduce Voldemort somehow, since I had everyone else; yes it's a bit predictable, but not completely, promise... there is certainly more of him to come, he'll be back!**

**Enjoy! :)**

**Chapter Two: Riddle Me This**

Harry flew down the hallway in utter panic. The Slytherins had intercepted James and Sirius, and launched an impromptu attack on Griffindor. Luckily Fred and George had got away in time to warn the rest of the House, hence mass evacuation.

Unfortunately for Harry, he was now lost. He'd never been in this part of the Academy before, as it was primarily used by the Dance students; and he had at least three Slytherin seniors tracking him who knew exactly where they were. It wasn't long before he made a desperate turn and found himself face to face with Bellatrix Black, Sirius' cousin. Spinning around he realised that he was surrounded – Vincent Crabbe blocked the way he'd come, and Theodore Nott stood between the hulking brute and Harry, smirking to Bellatrix. He was well and truly fucked.

"Let Lucius know we've got the Potter brat, Theo." Bellatrix' sneer was unnerving, and Harry almost wanted to ask Nott to stay, even if only so Harry could hide behind him – she looked slightly deranged, dark curls in disarray. In fact, she reminded Harry of Medusa.

Before he knew it, Harry was being held by Crabbe while Bellatrix laid into him with the ferocity of a rabid tiger. Generally she didn't look up to much, but Harry quickly discovered that her slender frame hid a punch like an iron bar (and fingernails as sharp as razors).

Once she decided he'd paid enough, the two Slytherins left Harry bleeding and gasping for breath on the cold floor.

"Mr. Potter, you're _sure_ that you don't remember who hit you?" Nurse Pomfrey asked, clearly concerned. But Harry had learnt several schools ago that naming the culprit only led to worse attacks, and refused to name his assailants. He was released rather quickly, all bandaged up. He'd faced the worst of the attack, except perhaps for Neville – he'd been brought in whimpering and muttered something about Gregory Goyle and a rake. The scrapes down his back and bruises everywhere else certainly placed him in the Top Five Most Battered Griffindors competition.

Sirius had apologised profusely several times to all of them – he and James had been relatively unscathed, left tied up in a cupboard. Since it had been their idea, they felt extremely guilty. But the House had forgiven them. After all, they'd all agreed to the plan, so it was unfair to make one person take the blame.

However it bothered Harry that this sort of thing was normal for Hogwarts. None of the Professors had even asked what happened to the bandaged Griffindors entering their classes – as long as they could still do their work it didn't seem to matter. Ron thought it was weird that Harry htought thye should.

"What do they care? They're not here to be our parents, they're here to teach. They're just doing their jobs."

Harry thought this was disturbingly matter-of-fact.

Harry slid into his seat, half breathless. He'd run to his first group Strings lesson from English on the other side of the building, and had gotten lost twice (since Ron couldn't show him the way).

"Nice of you to join us, Mr. Potter," Professor Snape sneered. Looking around, Harry realised that he had this class with Parvati Patil, Cho Chang, Rodolphus Lestrange, and both of the Malfoys. Lucius glared at Harry from behind his Double Bass, and Harry knew instantly that he should never have taken violin. Maybe a nice woodwind instrument, or piano, might've been a good idea. But of course it was too late; he'd been taking violin since the age of seven and could hardly change _now_, despite what Lucius Malfoy wanted. Harry was painfully aware of the lacerations and bruises decorating his face, and could feel Lestrange smirking behind him. With only one other Griffindor in the group and one Ravenclaw, he suddenly felt very exposed.

Snape seated him next to Draco, who was obviously Lead Violin, and handed Harry some music: Bach's Violin Concerto in E – Adagio. It was clearly something that everyone had been working on, but Harry had never seen it before in his life. The group began to play, stopping only if ordered to do so by the Professor and repeating short bars until everyone was perfect.

Harry couldn't keep up. He'd never been much of a sight-reader, prefering to learn by ear. Snape's scorn was blatant, and Draco Malfoy was grinning as Harry fumbled through beside him. The whole lesson was a nightmare, and by the end of it Harry realised that his past practice schedule was _nothing_ compared to what Hogwarts expected of its students. He suspected Draco Malfoy of practicing at least four hours a day – plus all of their various group lessons and tutorials. Hogwarts was certainly going to be more of a challenge than he'd previously faced; he had several pieces to learn almost by heart already...for an orchestral class in two days time.

He checked his slip – 'Tutorial, Violin: Tom Riddle, 106'. Now, if only he knew where room 106 _was_, he'd be fine. All tutorials were morning affairs, and the others had all gone to theirs before Harry could ask where he was meant to be going. If he didn't desperately need this one-on-one time, he probably would've given up by now and asked Ron when they next saw eachother, but given his current circumstances...

Eventually he found room 106 – half an hour late. The tutor was young, about 22, and quite handsome. Yet Harry could feel the hairs at the nape of his neck standing up, and knew there was something not quite right about this guy. Unfortunately it was far too late to flee and request a new tutor – Riddle had spotted him, and Harry had no choice but to enter and make his apologies.

"Not the best first impression, hmm, Mr. Potter?" Riddle looked complacent, but something in his tone warned Harry not to do anything to anger his tutor. He sat down and spread his music out on the nearby stand, before bending down to open up his violin case.

Suddenly he stilled.

Unless Harry was very much mistaken, Riddle had his hand resting lightly _on Harry's ass_.

The gentle caress that followed confirmed to Harry that his mind was most definitely not playing tricks on him, and he leapt up out of his seat to face Riddle, staying close to the door.

"Now, Harry, no games, hmm? It's just you and me here... no-one needs to know..." Riddle acted as though trying to calm a spooked cat, and Harry felt ill. This was practiced, polished – Riddle had done this before.

"Come near me and I'll go straight to Dumbledore!" Riddle froze, his features arranged into a rictus of gentility so fake that Harry fancied it were a mask he could rip off to reveal a monster underneath.

"Breathe a word, Potter – and I'll kill you. That is a _promise_."

Harry grabbed his violin and fled.

Ron sat dumbstruck as Harry relayed the events of the morning to him.

"But, Harry, Riddle's a past student, he taught people here last year!" Harry could hardly speak anymore, his stomach turning as he thought about what that could mean. Every student who took violin as a Specialty or Second (some took a second instrument or other art) was now, in Harry's mind, likely to have been raped by Riddle. After all, it didn't take a lot of imagination to come to that conclusion, and Harry always trusted his instincts. Riddle was bad through and through, no doubt about it.

When Ron told James and Sirius (Harry couldn't bear to talk about it again) their outrage was nuclear. Sirius threatened to take Riddle out himself, clearly wanting to slam a couple of punches into the evil bastard in retaliation for his actions. James was rather inclined to let him, and their ranting soon alerted the entire House as to what had happened. Eventually it was Lily Evans and Hermione Granger who were the voices of reason, reminding everyone that the best thing to do was to go to Dumbledore.

Riddle was duly sacked on grounds of sexual assault (and charged by Police).

The school's reaction the next day surprised Harry, however. Jack and Rose made a point of coming to see him, both hugging him and letting him know he could go to them if he needed to. The rest of Ravenclaw seemed indifferent – none of them so much as looked at him differently.

All of Hufflepuff seemed to think him a great hero for having got away and getting Riddle fired. Harry'd become some sort of legend to them for his 'courage'. Griffindor had been indignant but were now soothed, keeping an eye on him but simply maintaining existing friendships and strengthening others.

But Slytherin acted like a great injustice had been done. Apparently it was Riddle's old House, and they didn't take kindly to the 'false allegations laid by Dumbledore's pet'; words Harry himself had heard uttered by Bellatrix Black (Sirius told him later that his cousin had a bit of a crush on the ex-tutor). In fact the only Slytherin not glaring at Harry in the hallways was Lucius Malfoy – and Harry was determined to find out why.

**Ok, so I'll try and update each week, but as I'm doing first year Law at uni this might be difficult sometimes.**

**This is an idea I've had for a while, so I promise I won't just drop off the face of the Earth.**

**Please review and let me know what you think, ideas and criticisms equally welcome :)**


	4. Jack of Hearts

**Ok, I won't be able to update for a bit after this because I have tests coming up in Law and Philosophy (argh!), so hopefully this will be alright as a bit of a filler/insight into the other characters.**

**This will primarily follow Harry, but I wanted to introduce Jack and Rose a bit better. So here goes!**

**Chapter Three: Jack of Hearts**

_An Interlude of Sorts_

The invitation had been thrust into his hand by a nervous looking first year who'd run off before Jack could say a word.

The envelope was beautiful enough itself – clearly expensive by its texture, and a simple champagne colour. The inked caligraphy proclaimed 'Jack Potter', but Jack himself was wary of _anything_ coming from a Slytherin. Cho had explained about the infamous Slytherin/Griffindor War that had been raging for several decades, and with Harry and James in Griffindor he was rather worried in respect to the Slytherin's motives...

The invitation itself was of delicate green paper, quite thin, and the same black writing was once again used. The silver swirls decorating the border were unable to distract Jack's eyes from the words in the centre, however.

Jack Potter_,_

_You are cordially invited to Slytherin's annual_

_Halloween Hellraiser._

_Dress is club-wear/costumed._

_Please present this invitation at the door to the_

_Slytherin Common Room,_

_Halloween Night._

_We're always open..._

_You have been vouched for by:_

Draco Malfoy

The last few lines were the most suspicious. Why would Draco Malfoy want him at a Slytherin party? He'd been told that occaisionally other House members were vouched for and invited to Slytherin parties, but why him? He was new, and related to Griffindors – so Draco's motives were certainly suspect.

But if Jack was honest with himself, he'd already decided to go. He knew Rosalie had an invite as well, and they could go as Heaven and Hell quite easily – playing off being twins always works in their favour. It would be fun – and if Malfoy had hoped to embarrass him with the 'club-wear/costumed' idea, he was sorely mistaken. Jack had nothing he needed to hide.

Rose squealed in delight as her twin walked out to meet her. He looked divine – white ribbons were wound around his arms and torso, wings adorned his shoulder-blades, and he wore thigh-high white stilleto boots that he'd secretly bought in the holidays. The tightest, shortest shorts she'd ever seen showed off his best _ass_et to perfection, and she couldn't help hoping her own make-up was as stunning as the silver lines and lip gloss her brother wore.

With Jack's assurance that her skimpy red mini dress and killer stillettos were imaculate, they set off for the Slytherin 'Dungeons' – and a night of debauchery.

It wasn't hard to find the Dungeons – there were plenty of Slytherins milling around outside. Presenting their invitations to Crabbe and Goyle, they ignored the stares they were earning and made their way to the make-shift bar along one wall. Grabbing a cocktail off a Slytherin 'vampiress' who was almost spilling out of her top, Rose turned to grin at him.

"Well, pretty blonde girl in the corner = yum, so I'm going to talk to her. Have fun gorgeous!" Her quick departure wasn't unusual, and when Jack saw the nordic goddess she was referring to he entirely forgave her.

He'd just reached for his own mohito when a pale hand lightly grabbed his wrist.

"Why don't you try something a little more... potent?" asked Draco Malfoy, and Jack found himself looking directly into mercury eyes alight with mischief. He couldn't resist an answering smirk as he replied:

"Actually, this is for you. The absinthe* shot is mine." Malfoy's smirk vanished to be replaced by an expression of mild shock as Jack took the shot sitting next to the cocktail and downed it in a single gulp as though he shotted absinthe every day.

"What? Is there a problem?" This mocking enquiry seemed to shake Malfoy out of his stupor. His face morphed into a genuine grin, and he reached out for the mohito.

"You know what, Potter? I think I actually like you." And Jack couldn't resist laughing, and agreeing to dance.

The music was pounding through his body, the bass keeping time with his heart. Jack barely even registered that he'd been dancing with Draco Malfoy since those first few moments, or how close they'd become – Draco's hands rested on his waist, and he was grinding into Jack from behind. At any other party it would've been quite the spectacle, but this was Slytherin. Rose was making out with the nordic blonde; Daphne Greengrass was practically humping Theodore Nott; even Lucius Malfoy (who always acted like stone) was 'dancing' with Sirius' cousin Narcissa. Draco's assurances earlier that they were practically married didn't really make Jack feel any better about her near-nakedness and Lucius' roaming hands.

As Draco's hands slid down past his hips and back in a blatantly sexual manoeuvre, Jack grinned. He knew he came across as innocent, and often abused this fact mercilessly. Draco clearly thought this would be a great conquest, but Jack knew that _he_ wanted to be the conqueror. He twisted in his partner's grip and backed up closer to the wall. Draco looked confused for a moment before smirking predatorily and stalking towards Jack as the latter leaned back against the wall, stretching languidly to show off every asset.

Draco's long white fingers lightly traced Jack's face before trailing down to rest on his hips, bringing them flush against each other.

"Just so we're clear, Draco – I win." The look of confusion that flashed across Draco's face almost made Jack laugh aloud as he pressed his own smirking lips against the blond's.

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Draco was drowning, but struggling. He'd never been kissed like this – lightly, more of a caress than a kiss – and it felt incredible. But what Potter had said had thrown him. What did he mean 'he'd won'? Draco had been playing a game of his own admittedly, wanting to embarrass the supposedly shy Ravenclaw with the party. Yet the table had turned quickly, and he'd decided to make a play for the boy's... 'company' that evening.

Somehow Potter had even turned _this_ on him! It was un-nerving, and Draco could feel his calm control slipping away from him. This wasn't supposed to happen, damnit!

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Jack could only cheer inside as he deduced Draco's confusion and annoyance. He'd known all along what the handsome blond had planned, and it amused him greatly to turn Draco's own games back on him.

He let the blond pull away, not bothering to hide his own smirk as Draco's eyes bore into his. Jack was even tempted to laugh, but felt that this might be slightly suicidal.

"Come on, Draco. Your game was obvious from the moment I saw your name on the invite." Draco looked horrified, and Jack realised that no-one had ever been so blunt with him before. Deciding to take pity on the blond, he leaned closer to Draco's ear, and whispered to him.

"If it's any consolation – the kiss was purely because I wanted to." And with that he slid around Draco and headed for the door.

He'd almost made it out into the hallway when Draco grabbed his arm, forcing him to turn around in askance.

"Don't go. Please?" The look on Draco Malfoy's face was so humble and desperate that Jack felt himself pause and consider. This in itself was unusual – Jack rarely second-guessed his actions. But something in Draco's eyes told him this wasn't another game; it was genuine longing.

Promising himself he'd probably regret it in the morning, Jack smiled and stepped back towards the blond.

"Well, I suppose I could stay for one more dance..."

Draco's face lit up, and Jack couldn't bring himself to feel guilty for changing his mind.

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Draco was ecstatic. It was funny, really – usually he'd find his prey for the evening, seduce them, fuck them, and have no regrets. Yet something about Potter was making him re-assess this plan for the first time in all his years at Hogwarts.

Even though they didn't kiss again that evening (or anything further), Draco couldn't help feeling as though the evening was a greater success than any previous.

**So... please leave a review, let me know what's good/bad/could be done in the next chapters.**

**Hope you like my characters, I like to use a couple of them to be completely creative with (and yes, Jack is a favourite name for me. This one has a tattoo of a Jack of Hearts card... but I'm not telling you where yet ;) ).**

**Oh yeah: Jack is gay, Rose is a lesbian, Harry will probably be bi and James is straight ;P**

*If you've ever done absinthe, you can understand the HUGE alcoholic difference between the two drinks – if not: when my friend first did a shot of it she couldn't breathe for a minute. I'm rather proud of the fact that I wasn't quite as bad _my_ first time (more like 20secs...).


	5. Rocky Horror

**Hey, I'm back! Tests are over for now, although I've got two essays and another test soon... my Uni hates me.**

**Hopefully this and the next make up for my absence a bit :)**

**Enjoy!**

**Chapter Four: Rocky Horror**

Riddle's sacking was the last thing on anyone's mind as the first Performance Evening of the year approached at an alarming rate. Everyone was exceedingly busy, and if Harry had had time to stop and think he would've missed the animosity between the Houses. As it was, no-one wanted to upset the person they were acting with, their dance partner, etc., so all was calm and civil.

It had been decided that the Performance was to be a production of the Rocky Horror Picture Show. All music would be played by students, even the sets and costumes would be created by those taking Visual Arts. It was designed to give them all a taste of 'the real world', of what their lives would be like after graduation. Harry felt that this simply equated to 'busy, in the extreme'.

It _was_ quite interesting to find out who he knew amongst the cast. The list had gone up the day before, and Harry couldn't help but find some of the placements highly entertaining, as the cast were chosen from all those taking Acting, Dance or Voice:

_Dr. Frank N. Furter:Sirius Black_

_Riffraff:Blaise Zabini_

_Magenta:Bellatrix Black_

_Colombia:Lily Evans_

_Rocky:James Potter_

_Brad Majors:Ethan Carter_

_Janet Weiss:Lavender Brown_

_Eddie:Jack Potter_

_Dr. Everett Scott:Ernie MacMillian_

_The Criminologist:Seamus Finnegan_

_All other Acting/Dance students are expected to take minor roles as Transylvanians etc._

_Prof.s Slughorn, Lockhart, Jones, and Dearhart._

Sirius had so far copped a lot of flack for having to dress up as a transvestite, despite it being the lead role. His despair at having to act close to his cruellest cousin did nothing to endear the project to him, and Griffindors found themselves falling asleep to the sound of Sirius' grumbling.

James was possibly the most worried – he'd been spotted doing press-ups whenever he had a break, and was clearly nervous about having to bleach his hair. It had already been done once, turning it a bright orange due to his naturally darker locks. The second bleaching would be done the day before, and James was freaking out that he was going to lose all of his hair. It amused Harry endlessly to tease him about it in the halls:

"Hey James, should you be moulting?"

"Is there a ginger cat around? 'Cos you're covered in hair..."

etc.

James was not amused.

In fact, casting caused a lot of issues between students that Harry hadn't considered. Narcissa Black was furious that she didn't have a lead role when two new students did. Luna Lovegood didn't seem to care, as she was an understudy and close friends with Jack – Harry thought she would've been upset, but was proven wrong. Fred and George Weasley refused to act, since it would involve a lot of dancing. McGonagall blew up at them and sent them to do lighting. Daphne Greengrass deliberately sabotaged Lily's costume and was forced to repair it, and all in all people were going nuts, vowing revenge or crying in corners etc.

Even those with parts were having difficulty. Lavender Brown though Ethan wasn't good-looking enough to be her 'boyfriend' (Harry thought she had ridiculously high standards); Lily was awkward about dancing with Jack in an 'intimate' manner when it was clear to all that his older brother had the hots for her; and Sirius refused to so much as _touch_ Bellatrix, let alone speak to her (unless in the context of the play). It was all getting rather tense, and this tension had definitely spilled into the orchestra pit.

So far that day, Harry had been snapped at 7 times by Draco Malfoy, 13 times by Professor Snape, 3 times by the new violin tutor, Conrad, and roughly 42 times by Lucius Malfoy, who was seated behind him on a tall stool and found the mere sight of Harry enraging. Since it was almost lunchtime, Harry decided to give up all hope that today would be less stressful than the day before.

Lunch break itself was more than welcome. Harry slid into his seat next to Ron, who had already managed to devour four sandwiches and was hastily creating a fifth. Hermione Granger sat opposite him, an expression of utter disgust at Ron's eating habits gracing her face.

"Hi Hermione. How's the wind section going?" From the tired look that breifly crossed her face, not well, but her attempt to be cheerful got full marks.

"Oh, alright. We'll certainly be ready for the Opening Matinee. How about strings?" Harry pulled a face at his mince and cheese pie.

"Apparently, I'm the sole reason we're not perfect." Ron turned to stare at him with his cheeks bulging from sandwich.

"Bu' I 'eard Pa'il -" Harry groaned before he could finish.

"Yeah, Parvati forgot to repeat a section – which was supposedly because I turned the page. It was a draft from backstage! But no, it must be _my_ fault if Perfect Patil makes a muck-up!" Hermione took one look at Harry's glare and decided to excuse herself, heading over to sit with Lily and Lavender at the other end of the table. Harry buried his head in his hands and let out a deep groan. Ron simply turned back to his food and left his friend to sulk in peace.

"Honestly Potter, can you stop leaning back! That's the tenth time you've fucked up my playing!" Harry immediately wrenched his chair forward as far as he could, the glare from earlier now permanently etched onto his face. He was convinced Lucius Malfoy was moving forward, but if he complained to Snape the git would just tell him to shut up and get on with the music. Draco's grin was doing nothing for his mood either – it was highly probable that the Malfoy's had decided to see how far they could push him today.

"Hey Potter, you don't mind if I turn the page here? I have this bit memorised." His smirk dared Harry to refuse, and the challenge could not be ignored. He'd been asked to share with Draco after the 'Patil page incident' and if he admitted he didn't know the material as well as Malfoy it was an admission of being inferior to the blond. So Harry agreed, mucked up, and was promptly berated by Snape as both Malfoy's tried to hold back laughter.

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The Griffindor Dormitory was as silent as the grave the night before Opening. Everyone was exhausted and nervous. James was platinum blond and spray-tanned perfectly – he looked completely unlike himself, and Harry kept double-taking while talking to him. Sirius had locked himself in his room; according to Hermione, this was perfectly normal for him before a show, a nervous reaction of sorts.

Harry found himself desperately wanting to know how Jack and Rosalie were faring. Rose had ended up doing a lot of the choreography for the Transylvanian dancing, and had been too busy to so much as glance at him for the past fortnight. As for Jack – he hadn't done much acting before, preferring to sing with bands: he was bound to be extremely worried about the coming day. If they'd only been in Griffindor together, they would've sat together and talked through their worries, reassured each other. But with the twins in Ravenclaw Harry realised he was getting more nervous by the second. He'd only stuffed up once today, but once the day before performing is enough to freak anyone out – he had half a mind to run way rather than be forced to perform.

It was going to be a long night.

**Hope you liked it, the next chapter is being written as I post this, so it'll be here soon :)**

**Please let me know what you think.**


	6. Performance Part I

**Ok, so I got the script off the net, but I _have_ been listening to my soundtrack cd for the musical cues etc.**

**It should fit with the movie, but I can't make any promises...**

**I'll probably do this over two or three chapters - you have been warned :)**

**Chapter Five: Performance**

The day of the Opening Matinée dawned to find Harry curled up on the couch, miserable. He'd hardly gotten any sleep, having stayed up worrying until 2.00am and waking with the sun through the windows. He rolled over, falling off onto the floor and groaning in disgust at his own idiocy. Sleeping on the couch was not going to help his playing one bit, and since they had two performances that day everyone was bound to be highly strung (including Harry himself).

Sulking throughout his morning routine Harry managed to get to breakfast on time, but this did nothing to help his mood – the Malfoys looked decidedly well-rested, making Harry loathe them even more than usual in his stressed state.

Really, it was hardly surprising that the first performance turned out the way it did...

The opening went without a hitch. 'Science Fiction Double Feature' ran through smoothly as the lights dimmed and the audience settled.

The curtains were open, and the wedding scene mimed – Luna played Betty Monroe and threw Lavender the bouquet (and she even caught it). But something in Harry's gut told him it wouldn't last, and he was right.

JANET/Lavender: Oh Brad, wasn't it wonderful. Didn't Betty look radiantly beautiful. Just an hour ago she was plain old Betty Monroe. Now she's Mrs. Ralph Hapschatt.

BRAD/Ethan: Er...yes, Janet.......Ralph's a lucky guy.

(They both moved slowly towards down-stage, as called for in the script)

JANET: Yes.

(Lavender started to play with her hair, left out around her shoulders)

BRAD: Everyone knows Betty's a wonderful little cook.

JANET: Yes.

(Lavender began to look quite distracted and vacant, and Ethan was clearly starting to notice)

BRAD: And Ralph himself will be in line for promotion in a year or so.

JANET: Yes.

(Ethan decisively turned to Lavender, trying subtley to stand on her toe and get her to snap out of her daze)

BRAD: Hey Janet.

(Lavender scowled at him for a moment before realising where she was)

JANET: Yes Eth-_Brad_.

BRAD: I've got something to say.

(After quickly composing herself, she managed to indicate to Ethan that it was ok to continue. His sigh of relief could practically be felt in the orchestra pit, and Harry could feel those around him getting even more nervous as they started the next song)

JANET: Uh huh.

BRAD: I really loved the skilful way You beat the other girls To the bride's bouquet.

JANET: Oh Brad.

(The singing began. Thankfully for Ethan, he had a strong voice, but Lavender was clearly nervous. Natalya Marius would be singing with her from backstage, but that meant that Lavender needed all of her lines to be perfect – she would look foolish if she forgot a line and Natalya didn't)

BRAD: The river was deep but I swam it.

RIFFRAFF&MAGENTA as FAMILY/Blaise & Bellatrix: Janet.

BRAD: The future is ours so let's plan it.

(Ron slipped out of time, but quickly recovered)

FAMILY: Janet.

BRAD: So please don't tell me to can it.

FAMILY: Janet.

BRAD: I've one thing to say and that's Dammit, Janet. I love you.  
(Ethan almost missed his next line, but recovered...)  
The road was long but I ran it.  
(...running backwards towards church doors and singing at the same time, instead of after)

FAMILY: Janet.

BRAD: There's a fire in my heart And you fan it.

FAMILY: Janet.

BRAD: If there's one fool for you Then I am it.

FAMILY: Janet.

BRAD: I've one thing to say and that's, Dammit, Janet. I love you.

(Lavender almost ran into Ethan, just managing to stop for him to 'propose' – he got down on his knees and produced a clunky plastic ring clearly visible to the audience)

BRAD: Here's a ring to prove that I'm not joker. There's three ways that love can grow. That's good bad or mediocre.

(Parvati accidentally missed a cue, and Draco's glare could've butchered her. Lavender grabbed the ring, and flung herself at Ethan – who luckily had managed to stand just in time to support her. The bouquet was abandoned mid-stage)

BRAD: Oh - J - A - N - E - T I love you so.

(Lavender gazed at the ring, trying in vain to make it appear as though she liked it)

JANET: Oh!......It's nicer than Betty Munroe had

MAGENTA: (Peering up from behind a bush) Oh Brad.

JANET: Now we're engaged and I'm so glad.  
(Although Lavender certainly didn't look it)

MAGENTA&COLUMBIA/Lily: Oh Brad. (Both peer up and disappear)

JANET: That you met Mom And you know Dad.

FAMILY inc. COLOMBIA: Oh Brad. (peering up together)

JANET: (Taking his arm) I've one thing to say And that's, Brad I'm mad, For you too.

(Both Lavender and Ethan sat down on the church steps)

JANET: (Laying head on Brad's shoulder) Oh, Brad.

BRAD: Oh Dammit.

JANET: (Caresses his cheek) I'm mad.....

BRAD: Oh Janet  
(Ethan looked rather uncomfortable at Lavender's slighlty over-the-top flirting)

JANET: For you.

(Lavender cracked slightly on the high note, but luckily Natalya covered her, singing out over it)

BRAD: (very briefly kisses her) I love you too-oo-oo.

BRAD&JANET: There's one thing left to do-ah-ooh  
(They sprang apart in relief, jumping up for their cue)

BRAD: And that's go see the man Who began it

FAMILY: (backstage) Janet.

BRAD: When we met in his science exam It -

FAMILY: Janet.

BRAD: Made me give you the eye And then panic,

FAMILY: Janet

BRAD: I've got one thing to say, and that's Dammit, Janet. I love you.

(Ron accidentally dropped a stick, throwing the music out momentarily and earning himself a Snape Death-Glare™. Lavender and Ethan began to dance; badly)

BRAD: (Circling Janet) Dammit, Janet.

JANET: (Circles BRAD twice, admiring her ring on the way.) Oh Brad, I'm mad.

BRAD: Dammit, Janet.

BRAD, JANET, FAMILY: (Brad & Janet kneel together with each following word until they are kneeling on the floor)  
I love you.

(Lavender and Ethan almost forgot to kiss (deliberately in Harry's opinion) before the lights go down and they all hurry off for a scene change) A smaller platform had been set up next to the stage, laid out as a study. As the students changed the main stage, Fred brought the lights up on to this smaller one to show Seamus in the office chair0

NARRATOR/Seamus: I would like if I may to take you on a strange journey.  
(Seamus put on a pair of glasses with the lenses knocked out and picked up a folder that had been placed on the desk in front of him)  
It seemed a fairly ordinary night when Brad Majors and his fiancee Janet Weiss (two young ordinary healthy kids) left Denton that late November evening to visit Dr Everett Scott, ex. tutor and now friend of both of them. It's true there were dark storm clouds, heavy, black and pendulous, toward which they were driving. It's true also that the spare tyre they were carrying was badly in need of some air. But they being normal kids and on a night out, well they were not going to let a storm spoil the events of their evening.  
(Seamus paused as one of the sound technicians played a 'thunder' track for slightly too long – it was fun to play with, ok?)  
It was a night out they were going to remember for a very long time.

(The techie then played a lightening crack slightly too quickly, and Fred had to hurry to turn the lights from Seamus to the main stage. It was set up to appear as a stormy night, with Lavender and Ethan sitting in a small 'car'. Dean tore across the stage on a bicycle made to look like a motorbike (and looked mightily pleased with himself, as it was his only part on stage))

JANET: Gosh. That's the third motorcyclist that's passed us. They certainly take their lives in their hands. What with the weather and all.

BRAD: Yes, Janet. Life's pretty cheap to that type.

(The 'car' appears to stop, as the sign is brought closer to them more slowly from the opposite side of the stage and eventually stops. This is Ginny's only on-stage job, and she hates it)

JANET: What's the matter Brad, darling?

(George turns the 'headlights' up so that the sign can be read: "DEAD END")

BRAD: I think we took the wrong fork a few miles back.

JANET: Oh dear! But then where did the motorcyclists come from?

BRAD: Hmmm ... Well, I guess we will have to turn back.

(As the sign moved back slightly a techie played a loud bang – making the entire audience jump even higher than Ethan and Lavender)

JANET: What was that bang?

BRAD: We must have a blow-out.

JANET: Oh...

BRAD: You'd better sit here and keep warm while I go for help.

JANET: But where will you go? We're in the middle of nowhere.

BRAD: Didn't we pass a castle back down the road a few miles? Maybe they have a telephone I might use.  
(Ethan made to get out of the 'car', but Lavender pulled him back so violently that he almost fell on top of her)

JANET: I'm coming with you.

BRAD: There's no point both of us getting wet.

JANET: I'm coming with you.  
(she gets out with him)  
Besides, darling, the owner of the phone might be a beautiful woman and you may never come back.

BRAD: laughs.

(They both pretend to walk across the stage as the 'car' and sign are moved away from them. Armand deVere, the piano tutor, began to play the first few notes of 'Over at the Frankenstein Place', and there was a great scrambling in the pit to find music – much to Harry's annoyance the Malfoys were the only ones who'd been paying attention to where they were up to)

JANET: In the velvet darkness  
Of the blackest night  
Burning bright.

(As they walked and sang the castle silhouette backdrop slowly moved across toward them)

JANET: There's a guiding star  
No matter what or who you are.

(Once the castle was centre-stage they stopped walking and looked towards it – George turned on a back-light, so that it looked like a light had turned on inside the castle)

BRAD & JANET: There's a light

PHANTOM VOICES/backstage chorus: Over at the Frankenstein place.

BRAD:There's a light.

PHANTOM VOICES: Burning in the fireplace.

JANET: There's a light, a light In the darkness of everybody's life

(Cedric Diggory slipped on the guitar chords, and Harry saw Draco roll his eyes in disgust)

BRAD: I can see the flag fly  
I can see the rain  
Just the same  
There has got to be  
Something better here  
For you and me.

BRAD & JANET: There's a light.

(The castle was moved forward)

PHANTOM VOICES: Burning in the fireplace.

BRAD: There's a light.

(Fred and George turned all lights off before remembering to put a spotlight on Lavender and Ethan. Stage crew darted around changing the background, and the side curtains were pulled to create a 'front door')

BRAD: A light in the darkness of everybody's life.

RIFF RAFF(off stage): The darkness must go  
Down the river of nights dreaming  
Flow morphia slow  
Let the sun and light come streaming  
Into my life.

(As Lavender shivered (and Ethan forgot to) in the light, the sound techies went a bit crazy with the lightening and thunder effects; and Harry had to watch Snape sneering up the sound booth as he tried to focus on the music and Snape's half-hearted conducting)

RIFF RAFF: Into my life.

(Lavender and Ethan began walking downstage toward the 'door')

BRAD & JANET: There's a light.

PHANTOM VOICES: Over at the Frankenstein place.

BRAD & JANET: There's a light.

PHANTOM VOICES: Burning in the fireplace. There's a light, a light.

(They made it to the curtain and stopped, waiting – Ethan finally remembered to shiver)

BRAD & JANET: In the darkness of everybody's life.

(The spotlight was switched off, and Fred brought up Seamus' light again)

NARRATOR: And so it seemed that fortune had smiled on Brad and Janet and that they had found the assistance that their plight required - or had they?

(The light switched back after an awkward moment where Fred wasn't paying attention. The techies played some more of their thunder concerto before creating a doorbell ring – before Ethan had a chance to mime ringing it)

JANET: Oh, Brad. Let's go back. I'm cold and I'm frightened.

BRAD: Just a moment, Janet. They may have a telephone.

(Blaise appeared in the 'doorway' dressed as the hunchbacked butler and the techies played dance music softly)

RIFF RAFF/Blaise: Hello.

BRAD: Uh - oh - Hi! My name is Brad Majors. And this is my fiancee, Janet Weiss. I - ah - wondered if you could help us. Our car has broken down about two miles up the road. Do you have a phone we might use?

RIFF RAFF: You're wet.

JANET: Yes, the rain has been very heavy.

BRAD: Yes.

RIFF RAFF: Yes.  
I think you had better both come inside.

JANET: You're too kind.

(The music was turned up slightly too much as the curtains were drawn back to reveal the main castle set)

JANET: (sotto voce) Oh Brad, I'm frightened. What kind of place is this?

BRAD: (sotto voce) Oh, it's probably some kind of hunting lodge for rich weirdos.

RIFF RAFF: This way.

(Bellatrix tripped on the stairs and scowled as Blaise showed Lavender and Ethan around the elaborate set)

JANET: Are you - giving a party?

RIFF RAFF: No. You've arrived on a rather special night. It's one of the master's affairs.

JANET: Oh, lucky him.

(All three of them jumped as Bellatrix spoke from the staircase)  
MAGENTA/Bellatrix: You're lucky, He's lucky, I'm lucky, we're all lucky.

(Cedric and Ron quickly leapt into action, and Harry let out a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding – they hadn't had great organisational record so far...)

RIFF RAFF: It's astounding  
Time is fleeting  
Madness takes its toll  
But listen closely

MAGENTA: Not for very much longer

RIFF RAFF: I've got to keep control.  
I remember doing the Time Warp.  
Drinking those moments when  
The blackness would hit me.

(Blaise and Bellatrix began to dance, and Harry was proud to see that it was his sister's choreography – the screen put up to help with timing clearly showed every move, even if it _was_ in black and white)

RIFF RAFF&MAGENTA And the void would be calling.

(Blaise opened a set of double doors marked BALLROOM. The doors were pulled away by black-clad stage crew and the rest of the set revealed. Dean's 'Annual Transylvanian Convention' banner was draped across a wall. The Transylvanian dancers stepped forward and began to dance as well)

GUESTS/backstage chorus: Let's do the Time Warp again.

(Lavender pretended to faint and Ethan almost failed to catch her – so she scowled at him as she 'revived')

GUESTS: Let's do the Time Warp again.

(Fred brought the light up on Seamus again, so that everyone had to freeze as each scene took its turn with the lines of the song; a chart was revealed behind Seamus, which he used to 'direct' the dancers)

NARRATOR: It's just a jump to the left.

GUESTS: And a step to the right - right - right - right - right.

NARRATOR: With your hands on your hips.

GUESTS: You bring your knees in tight.  
But it's the pelvic thrust.  
They really drive you insane.  
Let's do the Time Warp again.  
Let's do the Time Warp again.

(Lavender and Ethan 'tried to leave', but Bellatrix stopped them with a glare)

MAGENTA: It's so dreamy  
Oh, fantasy free me  
So you can't see me  
No not at all.  
In another dimension.  
With voyeuristic intention.  
Well secluded I see all

RIFF RAFF: With a bit of a mind flip

MAGENTA: You're into the time slip

RIFF RAFF: Nothing will ever seem the same.

MAGENTA: You're spaced out on sensation.

RIFF RAFF: Like you're under sedation.

GUESTS: Let's do the Time Warp again.  
Let's do the Time Warp again.

(Lily slid down the banister for her solo... in the tiniest dress Harry'd ever seen)  
COLUMBIA: Well I was walking down the street  
Just having a think  
When a snake of a guy  
Gave me an evil wink.  
Well it shook me up  
It took me by surprise  
He had a pick-up truck  
And the devil's eyes  
He stared at me  
And I felt a change  
Time meant nothing  
Never would again.

GUESTS: Let's do the Time Warp again.  
Let's do the Time Warp again.

NARRATOR: It's just a jump to the left.

GUESTS: And then a step to the right.

NARRATOR: With your hands on your hips.

GUESTS: You bring your knees in tight.  
But it's the pelvic thrust.  
That really drives you insane.  
Let's do the Time Warp again.  
Let's do the Time Warp again.

(They all fell down, and Harry winced as he heard someone audibly growl at whoever had fallen on them)

JANET: Oh....Say something.

BRAD: Say! Do any of you guys know the Madison?

(It's deathly quiet except for the beat that Snape keeps going – they have to segue into 'Sweet Transvestite', and Harry's heart hammers in anticipation of Sirius' arrival. The lift must've cost a small fortune...)

**Hope this is ok, but it'd be great if you could let me know what you think! Thanks :)**


	7. Performance Part II

**The next chapter will be intermission - don't worry, there is a point to this! The bits I've added are going to turn out to be important later...**

_BRAD: Say! Do any of you guys know the Madison?  
__(It's deathly quiet except for the beat that Snape's kept going – they have to segue into 'Sweet Transvestite', and Harry's heart hammers in anticipation of Sirius' arrival. The lift must've cost a small fortune..._ _In it, Sirius is having a mild panic attack. The outfit might be traditional, but he can't help feeling incredibly exposed (and slightly unbalanced – he's not so good with heels). The lift carries him down behind Ethan and Lavender, and he takes a deep breath – it's show time)_

JANET: Brad, please lets get out of here.

BRAD: For God's sake keep a grip on yourself Janet.

JANET: But it seems so unhealthy here.

BRAD: It's just a..a party Janet.

JANET: Well I want to leave.

BRAD: We can't go anywhere until I get to a phone.

JANET: Then ask the butler - or someone.

BRAD: Let's wait awhile Janet. We don't want to interfere with their celebrations.

JANET: This isn't the Junior Chamber of Commerce Brad.

BRAD: They're probably foreigners with ways different from our own. - They may do some more folk dancing.

JANET: Brad - I'm cold, I'm wet, and I'm just plain scared.

BRAD: I'm here, there's nothing to worry about.

(The Transylvanian dancers rise up and turn to face Sirius. For a moment Lavender looks bewildered, but she remembers to turn around – and 'faint' into Ethan's arms. Her scream actually shocked even Harry, who expected it. Sirius steps out into the lights, and grins. This is _his_ song)

FRANK N. FURTER/Sirius: How do you do. I  
see you've met my  
faithful handyman.  
He's just a little brought down - Because  
when you knocked  
He thought you were the candyman...  
Don't get strung out  
by the way that I look.  
(Sirius strides across the Ballroom to the throne)  
Don't judge a book by its cover I'm not  
much of a man  
By the light of day  
But by night I'm one hell of a lover.  
(Sirius lets the cloak fall onto the throne, which reveals his transvestite attire)  
I'm just a sweet Transvestite  
From Transexual Transylvania.  
(He slowly moves back to Ethan and Lavender, doing leg kicks that took _weeks_ of practice to get right)  
Let me show you around, maybe  
play you a sound  
You look like you're both pretty groovie.  
Or if you want something visual that's  
not too abysmal  
We could take in an old Steve Reeves movie.

(He then pretends to ignore them as he greets his 'guests' – the dancers. Ethan tries rather pathetically to get his attention – but Sirius is in his element)

BRAD: I'm glad we caught you at home. Ah - could we use your phone? We're both in a bit of a hurry.

JANET: Right!

BRAD: We'll just say where we are  
Then go back to the car.  
We don't want to be any worry.

(Draco Malfoy suddenly pulls an electric violin out of nowhere – Harry, who wasn't expecting _this_ at all, could only stare in shock as the boy beside him begins to harmonise with the electric guitar – unrehearsed, yet perfect. It really helped Harry remember why he hated the bloody show-off)

FRANK: You got caught with a flat  
Well how about that  
Well babies don't you panic  
By the light of the night  
It'll seem alright  
I'll get you a satanic mechanic.  
(Sirius struts back to the throne, draping himself in it like an arrogant courtesan and smirking at them all in such an incredible imitation of Lucius Malfoy that many in the pit hide grins behind their hands)  
I'm just a sweet transvestite  
From Transexual Transylvania.  
(From the throne he gestures towards Ethan and Lavender rather slowly over the next verse)  
Why dont'cha stay for the night [ RIFF & MAGENTA: (echo) "night"]  
Or maybe a bite [RIFF & MAGENTA: (echo) "bite"]  
I could show you my favourite obsession  
I've been making a man  
With blonde hair and a tan  
And he's good for relieving my tension...  
I'm just a sweet transvestite  
From Transexual Transylvania.  
(Sirius struts down the Ballroom to the lift)  
I'm just a sweet transvestite. [GUESTS/choir & dancers: (echo) "Sweet Transvestite"]  
From Transexual Transylvania. [GUESTS: (echo) "Transylvania"]

(Draco Malfoy let out a final shriek on the electric violin, then set it back under his seat as though nothing had happened)

FRANK: So come up to the Lab.  
And see what's on the slab.  
I see you shiver with antici --- pation  
(Ethan flinched as Sirius practically spat the last two syllables in his face) (Chord!)  
But maybe the rain  
Is really to blame  
So I'll remove the cause  
But not the symptom!

(Snape finally lets everyone in the pit breathe. Fred knocks out the lights, and the entire castle is swivelled round by a small army of students to reveal the lab scene. Ethan almost forgets to remove his clothes, but remembers in time to stop Lavender from removing her bra – it's pretty clear she took something to 'calm her nerves'. The lights come up, and both are left as the centre of attention from both audience and dancers)

JANET: Oh Brad.

BRAD: (confidentially) It's alright Janet, we'll play along for now and pull out the aces when the time is right.  
(He turns to Lily, who has been staring at his Batman boxers)  
Ah, hi. My name is Brad Majors and this is my fiancee, Janet Weiss. You are ...

COLUMBIA: You are very lucky to be invited up to Frank's laboratory. Some people would give their right arm for the privilege.

(The Transylvanian dancers line up against a wall)

BRAD: People like you maybe

COLUMBIA: I've seen it.

JANET: (to Bellatrix) Is he - Frank - is he your husband?

(Sniggers ripple across the stage – partly because Lavender's so obviously high to anyone close enough to see her eyes)

RIFF RAFF: The Master is not yet married. Nor do I think he ever will be. We are simply his servants.

JANET: Oh...*giggles*

(Sirius strides into the lab, avoiding the tank and carrying a glass of champagne. He also wears a white lab coat over his transvestite outfit)

FRANK: Magenta, Columbia, go and assist Riff Raff.  
(Blaise, already by the switchboard, pulls Lily and Bellatrix towards himself, and Bellatrix trips slightly before glaring at him)  
I will entertain...ah...  
(He turns to Ethan, who quickly rattles off his line -)

BRAD: I'm Brad Majors and this is my fiancee, Janet Vice.

(Lavender, staring into space, forgets a line. Luckily it wasn't important [AN: just a weird Vice/Weiss thing that I thought was stupid])

FRANK: (Taking Janet's hand to kiss) Enchante....How nice.  
(he circles them) And what charming underclothes you both have.  
(He takes two dust coats from Riff Raff and hands them to Brad).  
But here, put these on. They'll make you feel less vulnerable.  
(As he continues, Lily and Bellatrix move over to the podium)  
It's not often we receive visitors here. Let alone offer them hospitality.

BRAD: (Moving towards Frank) Hospitality! All we wanted to do was use your telephone. A reasonable request which you have chosen to ignore.

JANET: (Hurring after Brad) Don't be ungrateful Brad.

BRAD: (Stepping closer to Frank) Ungrateful!

(The set falls silent. All eyes are on Sirius, waiting for his reaction. A smile breaks on his face)

FRANK: How forceful you are Brad. Such a perfect specimen of manhood. So dominant. You must be awfully proud of him Janet.

JANET: Well, yes I am.

(Ethan shifts his weight, embarrassed, as the dancers giggle)

FRANK: Do you have any tattoos Brad.

BRAD: Certainly not!  
(Ironically enough, it was well known to the students that Ethan Carter has a small tattoo of an eagle on his left shoulder-blade, which had been slathered in make-up before the lights came up)

FRANK: Oh well.

(Blaise moves behind Sirius, looming slightly creepily...)

RIFF RAFF: Everything is in readiness, Master. We merely await your word.

(Sirius drinks his 'champagne' (sparkling grape juice) and throws Blaise the glass – he almost misses the catch, but recovers quickly. Sirius strides to the podium)

FRANK: Tonight, my unconventional conventionists, you are to witness a breakthrough in biochemical research.  
(There is a gasp from all on stage bar Lavender and Ethan)  
And paradise is to be mine.  
(The dancers applaud. Lavender claps too, until Ethan stops her)  
It was strange the way it happened. One of those quirks of fate really. One of those moments when you seem irredeemably lost: you panic; you're trapped; your back's against the wall. There's no way out, and then suddenly, you get a break.  
(He cracks the bones in his hand)  
All the pieces seem to fit into place. What a sucker you've been. What a fool. The answer was there all the time. It took a small accident to make it happen. An accident! That's how I discovered the secret. That elusive ingredient, that spark that is the breath of life.  
(Applause again – this time Ethan doesn't bother to restrain Lavender, even though she's not meant to clap)  
(Moving to tank)  
You see, Brad and Janet, you are fortunate. For tonight is the night that my beautiful creature is destined to be born.  
(Everybody applauds. Sirius pulls the cover from the tank, and James' still form can be seen through the side as a black mass)  
Throw open the switches on the sonic oscillator.  
(Blaise flicks a switch)  
And step up the reactor power input three more points.  
(Blaise pushes a large button three times and begins to wind up a wheel. George goes nuts with the light display inside the tank, making James' silhouette flash different colours. Sirius looks like a child on a sugar high)

JANET: Brad...

BRAD: It's alright Janet.

(The lights stop, and James begins to move... he stands up, covered in bandages. Sirius and Blaise pull him out, and Blaise unwraps him from the feet up. There is a pause as the audience waits for Rocky to sing – but since James refused the song was cut [AN: I don't like it much...]. Instead he lunges for the lift, and is dragged back to Sirius by Blaise and Bellatrix)

FRANK: Well. That's no way to behave on your first day out.  
(James manages to look like a kicked puppy, and Harry can hardly believe it's his annoying brother)  
But as you're such an exceptional beauty I'm prepared to forgive. I just love success.

RIFF RAFF: (edging up to Frank) He is a credit to your genius, Master.

FRANK: Yes.

MAGENTA: (Moving to tank from controls) A triumph of your vill.

FRANK: Yes.

COLUMBIA: (Who is on opposite side of tank) He's o.k.

FRANK: O.K?  
(Moving out behind tank towards Janet and Brad)  
OK! I think we can do a little better than that. You. (To Lavender) What do you think?

JANET: Well.  
(She stares dazedly at Ethan)  
I don't like men with...er, with, with, um, too many, um, muscles.

FRANK: I didn't make him for you!  
(Lavender looks blank, but Sirius ignores her)  
He carries the Charles Atlas seal of approval....And he didn't even take the lessons.  
(Armand trickles his fingers across the keyboard, and the pit suddenly snap out of their contemplation of Lavender to actually play...)  
A weakling weighing  
Ninety eight pounds  
Will get sand in his face  
When kicked to the ground.  
And soon in the gym  
(James sits on a vault-horse)  
With a determined chin  
The sweat from his pores  
As he works for his ca-ha-hause  
(Blaise hands over some weights... and Sirius dances around singing)  
Will make him glisten - thank you - And gleam.  
And with massage  
And just a little bit of  
Ste-he-he-he-hem...(laughs)  
He'll be pink.  
And quite clean.  
He'll be a strong man  
- Oh honey -

GUESTS, RIFF, MAGENTA, COLUMBIA & FRANK: But the wrong man.

FRANK: He'll eat nutritious high protein  
And swallow raw eggs.  
Try to build up his shoulders,  
His chest, arms and legs.  
Such an effort -  
If he only knew of my plan.  
In just seven days,

GUESTS, RIFF, MAGENTA, COLUMBIA & FRANK: I can make you a ma-aa-a-a-an  
(James starts doing press-ups)

FRANK: He'll do press-ups and chin-ups,  
Do the snatch, clean and jerk.  
He thinks dynamic tension  
Must be hard work.  
Such strenuous living  
I just don't understand.  
(Sirius moves to stand by James, gazing adoringly at his glistening back)  
When, in just seven days  
- Oh baby...  
(James jumps up – into Sirius' arms)  
I can make you  
A ma-a-a-a-an...(laugh).

(The orchestra is cut off by Snape, who proceeds to scowl at Cedric Diggory for some muck-up no-one even noticed. Then there is a loud bang from the sound techies, and Jack Potter falls through a 'door' (a cut-out section of the wall between the lab/ballroom sets) in a cloud of smoke from a backstage machine. Dean's 'motorbike' slides out beside him, and he has a black Warlock guitar strapped over his shoulder)

COLUMBIA: Eddie!

(Jack staggers to his feet and picks up the bike. The orchestra begins again as Jack starts to sing)

EDDIE/Jack: Whatever happened to Saturday night  
When you dressed up sharp  
And you felt alright  
It don't seem the same since cosmic light  
Came into my life and I thought I was divine.  
(Lily leaps on to the pillion seat)  
I used to go for a ride with a chick who'd go  
And listen to the music on the radio.  
A saxophone was blowing on a rock and roll show  
And we climbed in the back  
And we really had a good time  
(All on stage break out into a dance routine – one girl trips, but recovers quickly. Harry could feel Lucius' sneer and knew the girl would hear from Lucius' 'Darling Narcissa' before long)

ALL: Hot patootie  
Bless my soul  
I really love that rock and roll (four times)

(Jack (more confident, less frozen) leaps onto the motorbike in a legs apart guitar strumming pose)  
(Sirius acts furious; James acts confused, and is awfully convincing since he's forgotten his steps and making it up as best he can...)  
(Harry found himself panicking as he tried to keep up – the picking of the violins was being used instead of some guitar effect, and it was slightly too fast for him...)

EDDIE: My head used to swim  
From the perfume I smelled.  
My hands kind of fumbled  
With her white plastic belt.  
I'd taste her baby pink lipstick,  
And that's when I'd melt.  
And she'd whisper in my ear,  
Tonight she really was mine.  
Get back in front and put  
Some hair oil on.  
Buddy Holly was singing  
His very last song.  
With your arms around your girl  
You tried to - ah - sing along  
It felt pretty good, whoo.  
Really had a good ti-i-ime.

ALL: Hot patootie  
Bless my soul.  
I really love that rock and roll.  
Hot patootie  
Bless my soul.  
I really love that rock and roll.  
Hot patootie  
Bless my soul.  
You know I love that rock and roll.  
Hot patootie  
Bless my soul.  
I really love that rock and roll.

(Vincent Crabbe rips into 4 bars of saxophone solo and Harry can't help his look of disbelief – Crabbe looks like a complete goon most of the time, and due to his separate practise and rehearsal seatings Harry's never seen him look so... serene?!)  
(FRANK steals towards the fridge where he collects an ice pick, innocently)

ALL: Hot patootie - Bless my soul.  
I really love that rock and roll. (times six)

(On the last chorus FRANK rushes to EDDIE with the ice pick, in a demented fury; the GUESTS are unbelieving; COLUMBIA covers her face with her hands; EDDIE is dead; FRANK walks away from his body unconcerned)  
(Lavender's shrieks echo across the stage, but Bellatrix and Blaise act bored, as though this happens all the time)

FRANK: One from the vaults.  
(RIFF RAFF drags EDDIE's dismembered body back into the fridge)  
And so perish all those who reject my love!  
(ROCKY cowers in terror)  
Oh no, my little Adonis - You're much too beautiful to be destroyed. He had a certain naive charm - but no muscle.  
(ROCKY flexes: FRANK is thrilled – and the music begins again)  
But a deltoid  
And a bicep,  
A hot groin  
And a tricep  
Makes me  
- ooh -  
Shake.  
Makes me want  
To take Charles Atlas  
By the ha-and.  
In just seven days  
- Oh baby -

GUESTS, RIFF RAFF, MAGENTA, COLUMBIA & FRANK: I can make you a Ma-ha-ha-ha-haan.  
I don't want no dissension  
Just dynamic tension.  
In just seven days  
I can make you  
A ma-ha-ha-ha-haan.  
In just seven days  
I can make you  
A ma-ha-ha-ha-haaan.

(RIFF RAFF presses a button and a curtain opens revealing a bridal suite done out in black silk – previously the Ballroom, but quietly altered during the lab scene. The GUESTS shout their approval. The end of the SONG turns into Mendelssohn's wedding march and Sirius leads James to his bridal chamber. The GUESTS throw confetti. Lavender and Ethan turn to each other in shock as Fred turns out the lights)

Harry had never been so happy for an intermission to arrive. Ethan was trying to talk to Lavender, who kept trying to find Seamus – apparently he'd been the one to provide her 'herbal relaxant'. Narcissa was in a fine fury; anyone near her was raged at, since she felt that it was somehow everyone elses fault that the drugged Lavender was playing Janet instead of her. Avoiding her as best as possible, Harry attempted to track down his siblings.

**YAY! Honestly, I had no idea it would take me so long to do this - it's actually easier to write my own stuff.**

**However, thanks to the real owners of 'The Rocky Horror Picture Show': you guys rule.**


	8. Intermission

**It's finally here! I'm so sorry I've kept you waiting guys - my Uni essays ganged up on me, but I've got a short break before my next one!**

**Hopefully this is up to standard, _Rocky Horror_ will be finished in the next one...**

_Harry had never been so happy for an intermission to arrive. Ethan was trying to talk to Lavender, who kept trying to find Seamus – apparently he'd been the one to provide her 'herbal relaxant'. Narcissa was in a fine fury; anyone near her was raged at, since she felt that it was somehow everyone else's fault that the drugged Lavender was playing Janet instead of her._ _Avoiding her as best as possible, Harry attempted to track down his siblings._

Jack was easily discovered – he was chatting to Luna Lovegood just off stage. Harry couldn't help smirking at the sight of him, as the stage make-up was truly awful from up close.  
But the indulgent humour drained from his face as he saw Draco Malfoy walk up to the two of them and start talking. Since when was that slimy Slytherin allowed anywhere _near_ James and Harry's younger brother?!

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Jack was buzzing. Sure, a lot of people had mucked up on stage, and Lavender really shouldn't be taking drugs, but he himself had performed quite well for his first acting gig. Luna was certainly proud of him – they were good friends, and she'd just congratulated him on a job well done when they were interupted by Draco Malfoy.  
"Well done, Potter. I actually managed to listen to you without wanting to cry."  
Luna looked unsure at this scathing comment, but Jack knew just how to deflect it.  
"Yes, I suppose it must be difficult to listen to singing and play violin up to standard," he smirked, as Malfoy turned pink in annoyance.

"What the hell do you think you're doing here, Malfoy?!" spat Harry, marching up to where they leaned against the wall. Malfoy sneered at him, clearly about to say something, but Luna piped up;  
"Oh, he's just congratulating Jack."  
Harry looked as though this were impossible, but Jack simply nodded to his brother in agreement before turning to glare a warning at Malfoy. Thankfully the blond seemed to get the message, as he shook his head and stalked off.  
"If he's bothering you, you can tell me or James. We'd get him to stop." Inwardly Jack scowled – he didn't need protecting! But he smiled reassuringly at Harry.  
"It's totally cool, Har. I think he's got a bit of a crush on me, actually." He couldn't help grinning as Harry's jaw dropped in shock and he started stuttering;  
"But, but, he – _you –_ what?"  
Luna began laughing hysterically at Harry's goldfish impersonation, and he scowled at her. Jack just continued grinning like a loon as he watched his brother try to process the idea of Draco Malfoy wanting his baby brother.

Of course, if Draco had heard this statement, he would have blushed terribly. (He often cursed his pale skin for this.) The fact of it was that Draco really _was_ rather enamoured of the younger Ravenclaw, despite his disdain for the older Potters. He'd been planning ways to get Jack alone for the last few weeks, and realising that intermission wouldn't be a good time came as a bit of a blow.  
But Draco Malfoy would not be so easily deterred from his mission – Jack Potter would be _his_, damnit!

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Harry wouldn't have been half so worried about jack's innoccence if he'd known what his only sister was up to however.  
Rosalie Potter and Natalya Marius had been stuck backstage for quite a while, and had taken to 'getting to know each other' whenever no-one was looking.  
Really though, Rose didn't think she could be blamed for this. Natalya Marius was stunning. At 6 feet, she was a leggy blonde with all the extras: ice blue eyes, sculpted features, and perfect curves. Since she only ever wore tight black skirts and tops it was no wonder Rose had been drawn to the older Slytherin for weeks. But the Slytherin party had been the catalyst, and she'd spent the entire night in Natalya's room (after dancing, of course!).  
They were being discreet though.

James and Harry had no idea that she was a lesbian, or that Jack is gay. Such things weren't spoken of in their house, and both of the twins had been too terrified to say anything. Behind doors was another matter. None of the Potters were inclined to believe rumours, so if anyone had seen her dancing with Nat and told them, they wouldn't have believed a word of it. This allowed the twins to be bolder in their affections than otherwise, and Rose couldn't help but be grateful that her older brothers trusted her so much, even as her guilt at lying ate at her. Natalya's lips were so soft, her hands so strong yet gentle – and she was smart, and talented (she couldn't have got into Hogwarts otherwise, after all); how could Rose pass this up?  
She knew Jack was having a hard time too, even if he wouldn't admit it. Her twin was more of a teddy bear than he liked people to believe, and often used his intelligence to make himself seem indestructible. But Rosalie was more aware than her twin realised of his desires – he wanted Draco Malfoy badly, but was scared that the Malfoy would play him.

A legitimate concern, really, she thought as Natalya's lips again sought hers. By now most of the students were getting ready to begin again, and no-one payed them any attention in their darkened corner.

Slytherins were known for cunning, manipulation, and luxuriating in excess. More sordid rumours circled about Slytherins than anyone else, and unfortunately Nat had admitted most of them were true. Lucius Malfoy was supposedly quite the player, seeing several others (both male and female) secretly behind Narcissa's back; Bellatrix Lestrange was known for her kinks; and even Theodore Nott, who could realy pull off 'inoccent', was a sucker for threesomes and orgies with both sexes. This made her slightly suspicious of her own girlfriend, admittedly, but there were no such rumours about Natalya – she kept behind the scenes of the more salacious scandals.

But poor Jack and Draco were another story, and she could understand why her brother was playing games. Usually more to the point in his conquests, Jack needed to feel secure of Draco's affections and attentions. And having Harry and James around was _not_ going to be helpful.

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Harry quickly leapt into his seat as Snape began to check they were there. He would've made it on time, but some bastard had barricaded the boys toilets, and he'd had to cause an unholy racket to get let out at all! He of course suspected the Malfoys on principle, but unfortunately now was not the time to prove any points: Snape was glaring at him to get a move on, and the show was about to go on...


End file.
